Nine Words

This came to me in an e-mail and, although some of them are phrases, I'm not going to change any of it.

NINE WORDS WOMEN USE

(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour. Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3)Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with nothing usually end in fine.

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. Don't Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but is a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to # 3 for the meaning of nothing.)

(6) That's Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a women can make to a man. That's okay means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you're welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says 'Thanks a lot' - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say 'you're welcome' . that will bring on a 'whatever').

(8) Whatever: Is a woman's way of saying GO TO HELL

(9) Don't worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking 'What's wrong?' For the woman's response refer to # 3.

A Night Of Splendor - #FridayFlash

The night of the Goddess Ball found a reluctant Chronos, resplendent in his tux, following Death into the ballroom to mingle with their peers in the cosmos.

"Why are you squirming so, my friend?" Death said. "Didn't you take the time to have your tux fitted properly?"

"It fits fine, I guess. I just don't like these soirees. They seem pointless."

Death's jaw dropped down in a chuckle. "Of course they are, but let's make the most of it, shall we?"

As soon as they had drinks in hand one of the minor goddesses rushed up to them, her light hair fluttering behind her.

"Thanatos, I've been dying to meet you."

"No need to be formal, my dear. My friends just call me Death."

Chronos hid a smile behind his drink. Death didn't like his name, said it had too many syllables for his easy-going personality. His hand clutched the glass tighter as he spotted her descending the marble steps and glide into the ballroom. Midnight hair swirled about a gown made of starlight.

Nyx.

Chronos couldn't catch his breath; his knees turned to jelly. Death slapped him on the back, breaking his trance.

"Breathe, my friend. Just whistle if you need me." He laughed and walked away with the blonde, leaving Chronos to sway like a mesmerized cobra.

Nyx locked her fathomless eyes on Chronos, a smile gracing her pouty lips as she glided over to stand next to him.

"It's been awhile since you've come to visit me."

The lilt in her voice vibrated through him. He stammered as he tried to reply.

"I-I've been terribly busy. Not enough hours in the day lately. You're looking b-beautiful."

"I'll expect a visit soon."

She blew him a kiss and walked away, leaving a scent of night jasmine to trail behind her. Chronos slid his arm across his damp forehead, snagging the small hourglass cufflinks in his hair as he did so.

Death strode back over, tossing peanuts into his eye sockets as he walked. One landed in a champagne glass being carried on a tray. The butler sniffed at the faux pas and handed the offensive glass over before continuing on. Death shrugged as he took it.

"I guess since he's already dead he thinks I can't do him any harm. It's a good thing I'm so easygoing. But what about you? How'd your chat with Nyx go?"

"Pretty well. She moved on to mingle with the other guests. Where's your new friend?"

"That silly little thing? She's way too young for me. Besides, she's allergic to peanuts. It would never work out."

Chronos nudged Death in the ribs. "Look who just arrived."

They watched the altercation at the top of the staircase with interest, wondering if the doorman would burst into flames.

"Lucien must be in a good mood tonight," Chronos murmured as they watched Evil knock the man down the steps without incinerating him.

"Greetings, Evil." Death waved him over and grabbed a drink for him.

"Some of the hired help here are rather stuffy, aren't they?" Lucien downed his drink in one swallow and waved for another. "He had the audacity to inform me that I wasn't welcome."

Death shook his skull and tossed another peanut. "The nerve. But enough about bad manners – you're looking great in that red cummerbund. The color suits you."

"Thank you. May I say that…"

Death and Chronos both looked in the direction that Lucien was staring at, wondering why he'd gone still as a statue. Lachesis stood by the buffet table, her golden gown a rival to the sun itself.

"Excuse me, gentlemen." Lucien absently handed his drink over to a bemused Chronos. "I see someone I need to talk to."

They watched the moth approach the flame in amusement.

"I didn't realize that Lucien had a thing for Lachesis," Chronos whispered.

"Oh, he's talked about her for months now…ever since she threw potato salad at him during the spring picnic. I guess he likes a challenge."

The ensuing melee around the appetizers had diners scattering as Lachesis flung the shrimp bowl at Lucien. He wandered back, dabbing cocktail sauce off his shirt.

"What did you say to her?" Death asked.

"I only had a chance to say hello."

"I suppose that was enough." Chronos grinned at him. "You have a shrimp in your pants."

"What? Oh…" Evil looked down and pulled the offensive morsel out of his waistband.

"Here comes trouble," Death murmured. "Did either one of you change a mortal's fate lately?"

Chronos spun to see what Death was talking about, just in time to see Atropos bearing down on them. Ares nodded in their direction and surged in front of her to run interference for the three of them while they melted out the back door.

"That was close." Lucien gave a little shudder.

Chronos mopped his forehead again. He'd have to get the tux dry cleaned after only wearing it for an hour.

Death linked arms with them. "Since we're all dressed up, how 'bout we go have some fun, mortal-style? I want to go dancing with people who know how to boogie."

Chronos smiled. "That's fine by me. Lead the way."

©2010 Laura Eno

Time For A Change - #FridayFlash

The door chimes played out a funeral dirge as Death answered his door. Chronos stood on the front step.

"Why so formal, my friend? Come in. You didn't have to ring the bell."

"The last time I walked in unannounced one of your Furies attacked me, remember?" Chronos shuddered at the memory.

"Just a slight misunderstanding. I assure you, it won't happen again. But tell me, what brings you here? I was about to come over to your place." Death ushered Chronos into the elegant mansion.

Chronos had to admit that the white marble floor contrasted nicely with the black walls and furniture but it still looked like a mausoleum – not a place of comfort like his own house. He wondered if the guest bed still had the rack of nails and sighed.

"I need a place to stay while they're replacing my carpet. Could I spend the night here?"

"Of course, whatever you need. I can't believe you're finally getting rid of that green shag carpet. Decided to update your look, huh?"

Chronos smiled at the dig to his anachronistic way of life. "I decided it was time for a change. Besides, you've lost too many peanuts in it. The vacuum can't find them all anymore."

He spotted a new curio cabinet over on the far wall and walked over to see what new items Death was collecting. Expecting shrunken heads or the like, its contents puzzled him.

"When did you start collecting tuning forks?"

"Do you like them?" Death opened the glass door and brought one out. "I've noticed that mortals collect those little spoons when they travel so I thought I'd collect forks instead."

"But these aren't eating forks."

"No, these are even better – they make sounds. I can use them to tune my motorcycle too."

A Fury flew through the room just then, diverting Chronos' attention. The beautiful woman flexed her claws in his direction before disappearing upstairs, her laughter skittering down his spine and shriveling parts below.

"Uh, they won't be in my bedroom, will they?"

"I can have them stay away, if you'd like." Death tossed a peanut in the air and caught it in his eye socket. "But tell me more about your redecorating. Are you putting down wood or tile?"

"No," Chronos said, a pleased smile on his face. "I'm going with a gold shag carpet this time."


©2010 Laura Eno

Reflections

Reflections run deep
The shadows within
Gentle soul shimmers
But lets no light in

Little girl no more
Dismissed with a sigh
Some tears in the night
But no one sees why

Child, now woman
Grew up just too fast
She let go her heart
Now innocence past

Deeply burns passion
But hidden the soul
Within do not look
So vulnerable

Naive and trusting
So easily torn
Another to love
No longer forlorn

©2010 Laura Eno

Wish

Just wish upon a star
O so easily done
But the wish in my heart
Is for two to be one

The shadows around me
Beckon, calling "Sweet Child,
Just lay down your head
And come dream for awhile"

As I sit all alone
In the gathering gloom
Light streaks through the window
And you enter my room

Your body soft to touch
Caressing mine freely
So full of desire
You penetrate deeply

O, if this is a dream
Let me never wake up
But the shadows call back
"Sweet Child, time is up"


©2010 Laura Eno

Treasure

It seems that it's National Poetry Month, or something like that. I don't write poetry, or at least I haven't for the last 30 years. Maybe I'll subject you to some of that ancient stuff on another day.

This one popped into my head as I was falling asleep last night - never a good sign.



Treasure

Blood red lips
A delicate ear
These are things
That I hold most dear

Now that you're gone
I treasure them more
Under the glass
For me to adore


©2010 Laura Eno

Death on Wheels - #FridayFlash

The rumbling started just as Chronos propped his feet up on the coffee table to settle in for a bit of TV. Startled, he glanced around the room but couldn't find the source of the noise.

As it grew louder, he could feel the vibration through the soles of his feet when he stood up. The hourglass on the credenza shook, scattering time in waves that would affect the mortal population on Earth.

Something was coming – something big.

Just as the noise reached an unbearable level, the double doors to his house flew open of their own volition. Chronos stared at the open expanse, wondering what creature was about to pay a visit.

He covered his ears in a desperate attempt to stop the rattling going on inside his brain as an image of flames and chrome filled his vision.

It was Death on a Harley.

"Greetings, my friend. Do you like my new bike?"

Chronos took in the leather-clad spectre, complete with black visor on the helmet.

"Turn that thing off, will you? My teeth are vibrating and I can't hear a word you're saying."

"Sorry, dude." Death turned the key after one last gun to the engine. "I said, how do you like my new bike?"

Chronos cautiously removed his hands, his ears still ringing from the commotion. He smiled at the flames painted on the gas tank. The chopper suited Death.

"It's nice, but did you have to drive it into my living room? It might drip oil on the carpet."

Death looked down at the green shag that hadn't been changed since the '70s, but decided not to say anything.

"Hop on. I have a collection to make but I thought I'd swing by and pick you up. It'll be fun. We'll take the scenic route there."

He tossed a helmet at Chronos. The scythe emblem on the side of it matched the one Death wore. Chronos laughed as he caught it.

"You never cease to amuse me." He slipped the helmet on and straddled the back of the bike.

They wound their way towards the appointed place, Chronos enjoying the wind whipping at his robes. Leaning side to side as they banked into turns at high speed, he settled into the rhythm and took in the scenery.

Too soon, Death turned the bike toward their objective – the island of Madagascar. He let the wheels touch into the surf, spraying water that soaked Chronos' robes.

"Did you enjoy the ride?" Death asked after he made his collection.

"I did, although I can see the advantages of wearing leather." He wrung more seawater out of his robes.

"Good. You haven't really experienced the complete thrill of the ride yet though, my friend. Perhaps you'll allow me to start the engine for the trip back?" Death dropped his jaw in a laugh.

"All right. But if I'm deaf by the time we get home you'll owe me."

"No worries." Death turned the key and the engine roared to life.

©2010 Laura Eno

Feature Story at the NOT

Thanks to Michael Solender for featuring my story, Blink, at the NOT today. I hope you'll give it a read!

Turn Back the Clock - #FridayFlash

"Great news, my friend." Death bounced onto the sofa with child-like glee after walking in the door.

Chronos sloshed the cup of tea he'd been holding while reading the paper when a femur struck him. He shook his head and smiled at Death's enthusiasm for life.

"What momentous thing has happened this time?"

"I have an appointment in a few minutes," Death said. "Come with me and I'll tell you all about it."

They arrived inside of a nursing home. The recreation room held a number of residents who called out greetings to Thanatos with great grim humor. Chronos looked around with interest as Death shook hands with people, working the room like a politician looking for votes. He wondered who was to be the collection.

"Who are you here to collect?" Chronos asked after several minutes of socializing went by.

"No one. I just stop in each week to visit. They consider me an old friend around here. But let me tell you about my news. Cleopatra has consented to finally go out with me."

"What made her change her mind after all these centuries?" Chronos knew that she'd rebuffed Death many times.

"Well, my friend, that's where you come in. I need a small favor. See, I told her about the androids in the beach bar, the time that you traveled 400 years into the future? She said she'd like to go there with me. I need a couple of grains of sand from you to take her though."

"Oh, no. Don't you remember what happened the last time I gave you some? You dropped them on the border between France and England."

Death shrugged and tossed a peanut in the air, catching it in his eye socket.

"I don't think the British mind being an island. They should have called it the Thanatos Channel though. Besides, I'm only asking for two grains this time. You have millions of them. Please?"

"I know I'm going to regret this." Chronos fumbled with his hourglass as he muttered dire consequences for any future mishaps.

He fished out two grains of sand and placed them on Death's outstretched metacarpals. One grain promptly fell to the floor and Chronos dove for it. A metal walker leg tromped on his hand while an orthopedic shoe stepped on the tiny speck.

Chronos and Death both froze as the wizened benefactor blossomed into a beauty, shaving 70 years off her age in an instant. Bemused, they watched the lithesome woman march out the front door dressed only in a housecoat and support hose flopping about her ankles.

"That one doesn't count, does it?" Chagrin colored Death's voice.

Chronos laughed. "No, but why don't I put them in your pocket for you? That way you'll know where they are when it's time to use them."

"A timely suggestion." Death linked arms with Chronos as they left, shouts of farewell following their exit.

©2010 Laura Eno

A Bountiful Day

I have two stories up today!

My story, Mistaken Identity, is up at Negative Suck. I hope you'll stop by and have a look. It's a great site.

Also, Michael Solender's Spring Challenge Contest at the Not has my story, Tasteless, as an Honorable Mention. Other great entries include: Angel Zapata (1st Place, accompanied by a great interview), Laurita Miller, Erin Cole, Tony Noland, John Wiswell, and more.